Is love really enough?
by GGADDICT22
Summary: Dawson and Joey never really were able to get things right but when there both back for spring break will fate step in and finally deal them a card they deserve? Or will the circumstances once again keep them apart? My fist DC fic please read and review C
1. Chapter 1

Joey Potter sat cross legged on her bed. Finally home from all the chaos that what college for spring break. It had been a daunting year and without Dawson she wasn't sure she could do it. But thankfully she had made it through. Barely though it sometimes seemed. She fell back on her bed feeling tired and relaxed. The sunlight streamed through her open window promising in no uncertain terms that summer was fast approaching.

Glancing at her bedside table she saw the picture. There picture. Removing it slowly from its resting place against her lamp. She started wistfully and a heavily creased well worn picture of her and Dawson. She shook her head as a wave of memories both beautiful and bittersweet flooded her. Joey could remember that day as clear as though it was yesterday. _It had been a boiling hot day in July. Dawson her and the gang had spent the day trying to film yet another of Dawson's movies._

_After the filming ended for the day the group found a shady spot near the creek. To talk, hang and just goof off. She was sitting on his lap his arms wrapped tightly around her waist and hers slung around his neck. He wore a mocking smile and she was on the verge of laughter. The were staring into each others eyes so visibly oblivious to the world around them including Pacey and his camera. The smiles they wore told everything._ If she felt this much nostalgia now she couldn't imagine what it would be like once she saw Dawson again.

She loved him. No, love was to mild a word to describe the feelings he stirred in her. Whenever he glanced at her she became completely unglued. His smile inebriating her to the break of insanity. He once had called her his 'soul mate' but they were so much more then that. He was her confidant, her best friend, the passion that drove her. Dawson Leery was her world. Her everything. No matter what he did to her she seemed unable to every let him go. One smile one brush of his hand and she fell in love all over again.

The feeling he sparked her were exhilarating, intoxicating, breathtaking, and wonderful. Those emotions consumed her whenever he neared She would do anything for him. She remembered all the times he's been there for her, never hesitant. He held her through her tears and provided a solace that she had never found anywhere else. She couldn't let go of him couldn't sever the ties that bound them no matter how hard she tried. She was always drawn to him.

Even with Pacey she could never completely drive her thoughts of Dawson out of her head. She had never, really given Pacey the chance he and her deserved. They could have really had something had she not been completely enamored with Dawson. And Pacey had been so patient always hoping that one day she would realize how wrong she'd been and given there relationship a real chance. But she couldn't, as hard as she tried Dawson was never far from her thoughts. And not matter how much he seemed to hurt her she could never let him go.

They seemed a doomed couple, star-crossed lovers seemed and inadequate term for there sordid history. Dawson and her seemed doomed to repeat a vicious cycle of love and lies and painful no, excruciating break-ups. She couldn't count the times that no matter how hard he tried not to, he had hurt her. Joey couldn't count how many times she'd cried over him. How many times had she made an ass out of herself because of him? She sighed heavily and shook her head.

No matter how many chances they had given it no matter how much trust and effort they put into it everything always seemed to fall apart. Not gracefully or even slowly, it shattered every time. And they seemed powerless to stop it whatever unseen force that was hell bent on not letting them be together.

Looking back over there long months of separation this year she had begun to realize that sometimes love just wasn't enough. It became painfully apparent that her and Dawson were never lacking in love for one another, but there was always something. Something or someone in the way. Love was something that was always supposed to be worth fighting for, work working for, worth dying for, but when was it time to call it quits? To throw in the towel? To say "Sorry but this is all just to hard." Had that time already past? Those troubling questions played in Joey's head unrelentingly.

The brief times they had been together it was perfect. It was wondrous a fairy tale kind of love. But maybe that's all it really was, a fairy tale. Just smoke and mirrors. A little world they had created because they weren't ready to let go. Were they even ready now? Joey once again could feel the tears pooling behind her warm brown eyes. It hurt. Actually physically hurt her to think about it all. The scars were still so fresh and she still wasn't sure if they would ever heal. They say that it hurts less with time but it seemed to her that it just hurt more.

Their were so many unanswered questions and silent accusations left between the two andshe knew the only way to fix it was to talk it through with Dawson but could they do that? After everything could there still be a we in there future? She could feel that age old pull she had always felt when something was bothering her. To a room and a boy she knew maybe a little to well.

A/N

I want to explain my reasons for this story. First I love Dawson and Joey they were perfect they were soul mates and so much more. But they never could figure it out and that frustrated me to no end. Joey and Pacey were just wrong they didn't have the chemistry that was so natural to Joey and Dawson. I know not many people still like Dawson and Joey but I dunno call it the hopeless romantic in me. Please read and review.


	2. once had been

What the hell was she doing? Joey questioned bitterly as she walked slowly but unwaveringly to Dawson's. Surely I'm not letting myself even entertain the idea of a new relationship with him. _It could be different this time, your both older and more mature it could work if you just let it._ The voice in her head stated. But they had tried so many times before what would make this time different from all the others? How did she know she wasn't letting herself being pulled into the same old cycle of love and pain?

Joey sighed shaking her head. She didn't want to think about this all now it was just to much. Her breath caught when she realized that she was standing right in front of his house, and try as she might she couldn't help but feel like the sixteen year old she once had been. She grew up in this house. Knew it as well as she knew her own. A small smile of remembrance and nostalgia overtook her worried face. This house held so many memories for her bittersweet and unrelentingly.

Joey strode purposefully feigning a confidence that she did not feel and rang the bell. Shuffling her feet as she waited feeling anxious and excited. After a seeming eternity she heard the knob twist open. Her heart leapt as she gazed upon the face of one Dawson Leery.

He was a bit taller, and looked slightly older, but her was still without question her Dawson. Just as he always had been. Dawson grinned joyously at the sight of her. "Oh Joey I missed you." He breathed before pulling her into a tight embrace. Returning his embrace she buried her face in his chest wishing wistfully that she could stay there forever. She could smell that scent that was unalterably Dawson. A potent blend of collogue and his mothers detergent. The smell of comfort. The smell of home. This was one of the few places that no matter what happened she had always felt safe. His arms were an unparalleled comfort and refuge from the outside world. He sighed as they broke apart. Clinging to one another a second longer then they should have.

"I missed you too." Joey said. He gestured for her to come inside. And she followed thankful for the moment to collect herself. They headed straight up the stairs to his bedroom. And she couldn't suppress the overwhelming feeling of wistful nostalgia for a time and a place mere years ago when things between them had seemed so much simpler. But the honest truth was that things had never been simple between them. And she doubted that they would ever be.

Dawson opened the door and it felt as though she had entered a time warp. Everything absolutely everything down to the posters on his walls were the same. "God I'd forgotten how much I'd missed this room." Joey murmured more to herself then Dawson.

Dawson smiled and said, "I know what you mean, I wanted to take some of my posters and bedding and such with me to school but it felt wrong. Like desecrating a shrine. A shrine to what I really don't know, what but this room holds so many good memories that I just couldn't bear to change it. As if changing it would mean forgetting all the things that used to be." He shook his head feeling stupid and plopped down on the bed.

She joined him on the bed, " I always loved the way you could do that. You know articulate exactly what I was feeling even though I couldn't do it myself. Though it was slightly unnerving not being able to keep anything from you. Ever." He laughed softly.

"Well that's what happens when you date you best friend." He uttered laughter still apparent in his eyes.

His voice suddenly taking a serious tone, "its been a long time, way to long, I've missed this." Joey smiled sadly now.

"I know I missed this, us too. I mean it's been weird not always having you there like you've always been. And though we talk on the phone its's not the same as having you here." Joey said softly. The words rang true for both of them.

He reached out and grabbed her and thankful to have her here with him. She squeezed reassuringly. There gaze met both mirroring that unmistakable love and longing that came so easily to them. Trying there damndest to ignore the feelings that were coursing through their veins inebriating them, searching in vain for a safe topic of conversation to prolong the inevitable.

Dawson's smile felt strained and forced through there awkward conversation. His mind raced with questions no of which he wanted to answer just then. And their seemed only one thing that he was sure of. That he was still in love with Joey Potter. No matter how hard he tried to stifle those feelings they came back with a rush every time he heard her voice or even spoke her name. Dammit Leery your in so far over your head your drowning in it. Every small smile or wistful glance she granted him made his heart flip and his stomach lurch.

So there he sat holding her hand. Feeling like the sixteen year old he once had been. Hoping to god that his face didn't convey the storm of feelings welling inside of him. But could they do this again? He had hurt her so much, though she tried not to let him see. He respected her all the more for that.

"Hey Joey look" Dawson said pointing out the window. The sun was setting now, a brilliant show of golds, pinks, soft purple, and gentle blues swirling and blending softly could be seen through the widow. They sat together contentedly watching it. His arm unconsciously found its way securely around her shoulders and her head fell against his chest. Neither of them could deny the overwhelming feeling of rightness that swelled within the pair.

It seemed as though nothing had changed between the two of them. No matter how long they had been apart they so quickly fell into a quite intimacy that left others baffled. The pair had long since passed that need for conversation that others so desperately relied on to fill the void left by silence. Perfectly pleased with being left with their own thoughts. For the two certainly had a lot to think about.

They sat there in silence for a long time both trying to work up the nerve to take that first step. A leap of blind faith had never been easy for either of them. Trying to make it all seem less of a big deal. All the while knowing that whatever transpired tonight would change the course of their relationship forever. He wanted to scream at the unfairness of it all. Dawson sighed feeling stupid for not just doing it. But since when had impulsivity ever been his strong point. "Never that's when..." Dawson muttered silently.

Joey gave him a questioning look then smiled and shook her head knowing that Dawson was just being well Dawson. They chatted aimlessly not quite sure what to say both dancing perilously close to just spilling it all. "It shouldn't be this hard..." Dawson said suddenly completely absentmindedly almost as though he hadn't realized they had been said. Joey turned and looked at him again confused. She met his eyes with her own seeing, almost feeling the truth in his words as though they were tangible.

"What shouldn't be this hard?" Joey asked knowing damned well what he was talking about but not so sure she wanted to here the words. The sun had long since set now and the room was basked in luminous and eerie moonlight. The whole room felt surreal more like one of the sets of Dawson's movies they the reality that it was.

"Us...this...everything.." Dawson said feeling slightly more sure of himself knowing that even if she turned him down that at least their was finally something real between the pair.

"When was it ever guaranteed to be easy? Especially between us. Things have always been hard because there has always been so much baggage... maybe to much..." Joey countered letting the last statement hang in the air like a storm cloud on the horizon.

"But its always been worth it right?" Dawson asked. Hoping she hadn't given up all hope for a second chance. Knowing that this may be the last time he would be able to conjure enough courage to say what was needed.

"Yeah for the brief glimmering instances that we were a we it was perfect and wonderful and beautiful... but the break-ups the mistrust and the pain hurt so much..." Joey said her voice growing ragged with the honesty of her admission. They were bringing it all back and it hurt. Dredging up old issues, he was making her confront things she didn't know that she was ready to confront. RUN her mind exclaimed. Run and don't look back. Joey leaped to her feet then as though she had been physically hurt. Forcing a wan smile she said, " Dawson Its getting late and I've gotta go call me later and we'll talk okay?" the words felt as hallow as they sounded she turned to walk to the door.

Dawson grabbed her arm gently as though he was afraid to scare her away he drew her near to him. She felt herself being pulled to him without a thought to resistance. He stepped even closer. "Don't.." he said "Don't let it...don't let us end like this..." Now they were mere inches apart he cradled the back of her head his other hand still holding her arm and kissed her. The kiss was soft and serious he went slowly almost as though he was asking for permission. Trying to convey without words the feelings that he felt from her.

Her arm snaked around his neck as she responded to the kiss. Their minds raced at the enormity of it all. Running purely on instinct now the kiss deepened warning signs flashed in their minds. _Better back away now you know what will happen if you don't then you'll both be back to square one. _After a few more minutes the broke from one another. The only sound in the room was the sound of their ragged breaths. Willing self control Dawson went first, "Maybe that wasn't in the right order but Joey we both...or at least I hope you do too want to give this..." he made a awkward gesture with his hand "us... a second chance."

She didn't know what to say it was all just too surreal. Joey forced herself to think. Can we really be doing this again? It hurt so much last time and I'm still not so sure that I'll be able to deal with it all again if we break up. Anxiety and malaise shone in her soft brown eyes. Dawson smiled at her trying to be comforting but still struggling with what it all meant himself.

He put his arm around her shoulders and drew her into another warm embrace he held her tightly trying to be supportive and understanding. Joey clung to him thankful that at least for an instant she didn't have to stand alone. Her smile was warm and bittersweet as they broke. Like I said she thought vaguely when is life supposed to be easy. She kissed him lightly and fully on his lips. Promising without words that she's give it a shot. But still so very afraid of what would happen if their wasn't a we anymore.

A/N

plz tell me what you think I want your honest feedback cuz I can't be a dettwer writer in you people don't tell what I'm doing wrong. SO STORY SHORT PLZ REVIEW


	3. Control

They were giving in to fast. Joey was coming dangerously close to letting Dawson back in. Back into her heart. A place she swore she'd never let him in again. But when he had kissed her. She felt something that she had only felt with him. It was powerful and right and beautiful coursing through her veins intoxicating her like a drug. Joey sighed heavily anxiety and uncertainty flooding her weary mind. She was sitting on the dock overlooking the creek.

When she had left Dawson's house she'd been running on autopilot and somehow found herself sitting on the edge of the dock feet dangling over the murky black water. Joey wore a jean jacket a couple of sizes too big, her soft brown hair fluttering wildly in the breeze. The air was warm and fell around her pleasantly. The stars shone luminously burning almost overly bright against the pitch blackness of the sky above.

What was she doing? Was she seriously giving Dawson and her's relationship another chance? Could she do that again? The pain of there past attempts had been more then she could bear. It was all so fresh. Can you say masochistic she thought bitterly. Joey sighed laying herself against the dock, her mind racing with the events of the night. Am I tricking myself into something that will just cause me more pain?

_Just trust him, god trust yourself. You know your meant to be just suck it up and take the leap. Give it. Give him the chance you both deserve._ The voice in the back of her mind said. But taking the leap. Letting him in. She wasn't sure she could hand him her heart and pray that he wouldn't break it again. She'd done that many times before. Maybe to many to ever really trust. To ever just go on blind faith and gut instinct again.

She closed her eyes willing it all to just be easier. For them, just this once, be an easy answer. Harsh mirthless laughter rose in her throat, for she knew that it would never be that simple. That things with Dawson no matter her decision, would never be easy. Their was just too much, pain, too many fears, too much passion for things to ever be simple. And sometimes that's okay. Joey knew deep down that what they shared was rare, something worth working for, something worth fighting for. That through all her tears and scars she knew that she would never love someone else as much as she loved Dawson Leery.

But will that be enough? Will we? Can we even, overcome all the baggage and start fresh? Is that even an option anymore? Trust was something she had never handed out easily she'd been hurt too much between the scars of her mothers death, and her fathers imprisonment, and the emotional tug of war with Dawson she rarely trusted those around her. Always wary and afraid of being hurt again. But here she was contemplating giving it, giving him, another shot. Joey slowing brought her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around her knees feeling helpless.

She bit her lip wondering if it was just time to walk away. Away from all the pain and the tears, the uncertainty and fear. Turning tail and run seemed to be the easiest and safest option for her. The one that entailed less hurt, less tears, less heartache. But Joey still could not shake that nagging feeling that though it seemed safer it didn't mean that it was necessarily the better path to take. Did it? The inner turmoil that raged inside her threatened to escape. She swallowed violently forcing herself to remain in control. At least a little.

Feeling as though if she kept her emotions in control she could have some control on the developing situation between her and Dawson. Even though she knew that she was once again powerless to stop what happened when he smiled at her, when he touched her, or when he kissed her. It was like riding on a river, unrelenting, constant, and fast-moving. Joey sighed painfully knowing that whatever transpired tomorrow would change, would define the course of there relationship. Possibly forever.

A/N

I know there wasn't a lot of action in this chapter but Joey needed to think and it seemed to important to leave you guys out of it. And I've learned from some of my previous ff that I'm really into the introverted thought processes I like to figure out how people think. Okay guys I have to know what you think about this chapter I can't get better if you don't help. Alright please review!


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